Dare Ya

First, the political updates, then on to the fun stuff. 

• Didn't watch the State of the Union. I know what the State of the Union is and I know that Dubya would even mess up telling us what it is. Plus I can barely stomach reading the quotes from the man on my Out of Office Countdown Calendar, I just couldn't sit through a whole speech. (One aside, Pell Grants for Kids???? Say it with me folks, that is just school vouchers in a shiny new coat.)
  
• Today is Florida's primary. So if you are a Florida Republican, go vote for Ron Paul. More on that tomorrow.

The February issue of Vanity Fair had this great list of Valentine's Dares. They made me laugh out loud several times and I thought were quite worthy of sharing. Enjoy!

1. In your workplace, distribute Necco Sweetheart candies custom-inscribed MITT '08.
2. Tell your girlfriend that you've planned a romantic night in—and upon her arrival, start up a DVD marathon of Judy at Carnegie Hall, Liza with a "Z," and Yentl.
3. Book a coveted table for two at the most romantic restaurant in town, show up with a buddy, and engage in a loud argument over who is the better guitarist, Joe Satriani or Steve Vai.
4. Stand outside the home of your beloved with a boom box and re-enact John Cusack's arms-aloft "In Your Eyes" scene from Say Anything—only with the boom box playing "Movin' On Up" from The Jeffersons.
5. Every time you see a couple kissing, lean into them and say lasciviously, "Hey, lemme get some of that."
6. Using a vacuum cleaner with the floor-brush attachment removed, give yourself a conspicuous hickey. Then strut around the office saying "Who's the man!" while shooting "double pistols" at colleagues with your index fingers.
7. Ask your clergyman if he has plans for the evening, making air quotes around the word "plans" and thrusting your pelvis.
8. Stand outside the most romantic restaurant in town with your young children, holding up placards that say SINNERS and screaming, "Re-pent, for-ni-cay-tors!" at couples as they enter and exit the restaurant.
9. Feigning Canadianness, insist to your co-workers that February 13 is Canadian Valentine's Day. On that day, present a knobby parsnip to an attractive colleague and say, "This is how we show our love up north."     

Now go out and show your love . . .